Mandrake News

(Reusetters) Project Mandrake has uncovered the actual location of the January 15, 2022 FBI raid in Texas.  The raid in this video occurred at the residence of a Mrs. Gladys McGintie, a retired Grandmother of 7 and member of Kiwanis, who was to be arrested under probable cause for attending the January 6 2021 Trump rally.   

We caught up with FBI regional director James Tavistock who relayed the following:

Mandrake.  Mr. Tavistock, how were you able to subdue Mrs. McGintie without a single injury to the rather sizable FBI force at the scene?

Tavistock.  Well, I can’t go into too much detail for obvious reasons, as we were dealing with a Domestic Terrorist of unknown motives. Suffice to say that our first move was to take her out quickly so we, and all of America, were protected. 

Mandrake.  How were you able to pinpoint her location so quickly?

Tavistock.  We used Google Maps.  We confirmed it was actually her home because an informant, implanted at a recent Kiwanas Cell meeting, had spoken to us recently and said that Mrs. McGintie likes to bake brownies on Saturday afternoon. 

Mandrake.  Brownies?

Tavistock.  Yes.  And since she puts them in the window to cool,  the 30 of us simply waited for the scent.  That’s what led us right to her.

Mandrake.  Brilliant.  And none of your heavily armed troops suffered any injuries?

Tavistock.  Our risk declined almost immediately after our lead sniper in the turret vehicle caught her neatly in the back of her head with a 6.8 SPC armor piercing round shortly after she placed the brownies in the window.

Mandrake.  That seems kind of brutal?

Tavistock.  Well, we were dealing with a dangerous person who could have resisted arrest or put on a backpack with IEDs. Our job is to protect our Democracy.   Can I have your address and full name? 

Mandrake.  I was just asking.  

Sic Semper Tyrannis

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